Tips From Trish
How can something as wonderful as becoming engaged be a huge source of stress? I'm afraid that the social expectations that get imposed on your wedding can be a part of it, as your own expectations will be. Unless you are planning to "run away" and get married (which is stressful in its own way) the best approach is to expect stress and find ways to manage it.
Some brides find that hiring a wedding planner relieve some of the burden of details and execution of mutually planned events. That can be a huge stress reliever. But know that it is up to you to get hold of the basic decisions - the stress points if you will - and deal with them early on.
Consider the source of the stress as you work to manage or eliminate it.
- If money issues are the main source of stress, you need to take the time as a couple to determine your priorities. List the items that you both consider THE MOST IMPORTANT. If you have a list of 10 or 12 items, select the top 5. Then list them in priority order. These five items are the ones you are least likely to want to compromise. Create the budget around those key items. If you have fallen in love with a specific gown that is outside your budget, you'll know that you need to "borrow" funds from another area to keep the budget in balance.
- If family is a source of stress for you, figure out where it's coming from (or who) and communicate your feelings. Talk out the issues you see with your parents, friends and those involved. If it's coming from the groom's family, he'll need to be involved in smoothing out those wrinkles. Be firm in discussions about your wedding plans and don't "stuff" your feelings but do try to be respectful of the feelings of others whenever possible.
- If the stress is coming from the list of things to accomplish and you are feeling overwhelmed by the myriad of details, enlist help. You have parents, future in laws and friends who can share the responsibilities. There is no rule that says you must do it all yourself.
- Take care of yourself. Take your vitamins. Continue to gym workouts. Eat balanced meals. Get plenty of sleep and remember your finance'. You are a couple. You will soon be husband and wife. Who sits where at the reception should not be a source of argument between you.
- When it all gets too much, speak with one of our experienced consultants. They can help you put it all in perspective and remind you of what's really important in this wedding you are planning.